Sunday, July 22, 2012

Going Backward to Move Forward


My last post was over a month ago. It was posted at midnight on my Birthday. When writing that post I had hoped that the worst would be over, yet one thing that I have learned never to say is “it cannot get any worse”. I have learned the hard way too many times to utter those words. My 51st Birthday was no exception.  The day started out great, I celebrated with my co-workers and Sprinkles cupcakes. 

My boss and I had a 3:00 meeting and after that meeting she told me to head home early. On my way back to my office to gather my things I decided to check my personal email. I stopped dead in my tracks to try and comprehend the meaning of what I was reading. Three emails pertaining to 3 different bank accounts, all indicating I now had a $0.00 account balance. A frantic call to the bank, followed by a frantic call to an attorney, followed by a frantic call to MY attorney all on a Friday afternoon at about 4:30pm. I will sum it up for this post as…moving to a Community Property state was not one of my smarter decisions in life.
As I realized the magnitude of what was happening, tears started rolling down my face. My co-worker gave me a hug, helped me locate the nearest branch of the bank in which my accounts were not frozen and told me she and her boyfriend were going to pick me up later to take me out for my Birthday.
When I got home, my daughter had bought me a cake and they had made me cards. 

We went out to dinner and then came home and had cake. My friends picked me up and took me out for a few hours; I was carded and wished a Happy Birthday at the same time. I was determined to have a nice Birthday.
After the initial shock of what happened, I can say that in many ways that event made some hard decisions for me. In being forced to go backward, it will allow me to move forward. It was not what I had wanted, but I will not have to keep looking over my shoulder and waiting for another email like the ones I received.
Thank you for my followers who have kept checking in on my blog, to those who have emailed me to make sure I am okay and to my friends who have called and/or supported me on the phone or in person. I have decided to step back from some things for a bit. Cancer forced me to step back a few years ago and I am trying to remember that lesson and to step back on my own. I want to let you all know that I am healthy, but I am tired and I need to slow down and prioritize. I am studying for my Real Estate Salesperson Licensing test next month and I want to enjoy summer and some downtime.
I thought about taking down this blog. I eventually want to start a new blog, but I have decided to keep this one as an archive of this phase of my life or as much of it as I could share. People have told me that my story could help other women, twice in one day I saw this quote:

“You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better.
-- Anne Lamott”

Synchronicity?  

With that I will state that this blog is about me…hence the title of the blog… if you do not like what you are reading (or if I am not speaking warmly about you), please feel free to move your mouse up to the little red “X” in the top right of your screen and click close. If you read this blog in Facebook and/or are my “friend” you can always unfriend me. I won’t be offended. I have been unfriended and unfamilied in real life.
A few years ago I did volunteer work at a batter women’s shelter. Many of the women I met did not have a higher education, English was not their first language, they usually had 3 or more children and many had to leave in the middle of the night with just the clothes on their backs. They had to start over, create a new life and assure their children that everything would be alright. Their strength was so empowering to me. We will not only survive… we will thrive…

a collaborative effort with the kids 





1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Mary Beth
Love you so much and I am so sorry to hear about this major setback. Please don't stop your art--this is the thing that can save you. The nice thing about this story is how gret your friends were. Pleeeeease, please take care of upirself, and keep creating!
Karna

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